


Undying

by juicytree21



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti)
Genre: Coming Out, F/M, First Kiss, Fluff, God i hope people like this, Horror, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Sex, M/M, Suicide Attempt, Wedding Fluff, its shorter than i wanted but oh well
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-20
Updated: 2020-04-12
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:08:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 18,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22332427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/juicytree21/pseuds/juicytree21
Summary: After they defeat It, The Losers try to fix their lives and the relationships they have with one another. Richie is dealing with conflicting emotions, Eddie is probably gay, Mike has been in love with Stan for over 20 years, and Stan is dealing with a bunch of shit.------------------------------------------------I'm bad at descriptions but it's really good, y'all. One of my favorite works.
Relationships: Ben Hanscom & Beverly Marsh, Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Mike Hanlon & Stanley Uris, Mike Hanlon/Stanley Uris
Comments: 10
Kudos: 43





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Oh holy shit! I actually uploaded! I'm not dead! And I'm writing a fic for two different ships than what I've written in the past because I have the attention span of a beetle and get bored with ships and shows/movies/books very easily. So enjoy this while it lasts!

"Yippee ki yay, motherfu-!" Richie was cut off as the deadlights shone directly into his eyes. He was vaguely aware of his body being lifted into the air before he went completely numb. It felt like every nerve ending in his body was dying. His mind was suddenly filled with horrible visions of all of the ways  **_It_ ** planned to kill them. 

He saw  **_It_ ** impale Eddie, squeeze Mike to death, bite off Ben's head, slam Bev into the ground until she was a bloody pulp, and rip Bill limb from limb. Then he saw  **_It_ ** pick him up and bring  **_Its_ ** enormous mouth down on his catatonic form. The visions replayed over and over in his head for what seemed like forever when suddenly he was falling.

He laid on his back, disoriented for a moment when, in a flash, Eddie was kneeling over him, bringing him back to reality. He was smiling and talking excitedly about how he'd killed  **_It_ ** . 

"No!" Richie wrapped his arms around Eddie and rolled them both out of the way as **_Its_** massive claw came down and pierced the spot they'd been mere seconds before.

Eddie laid underneath Richie, looking up at him with wide, scared eyes. The clown cackled maniacally behind them and Richie stood quickly, pulling his friend to his feet. Ben motioned towards an opening in the cave wall and they took off running towards it.

Once they'd all practically slid down the natural staircase, they stopped to catch their breath. Pennywise taunted them from the entrance, scrabbling at the stone and trying to break  **_Its_ ** way in. Eddie was panting heavily and instinctively reached for an inhaler that was no longer there. 

"How did you know?" He asked Richie, taking in big gulps of air.

"The deadlights. I saw  **_It_ ** kill all of us." 

Mike was pacing at the back of the group and mumbling to himself. Richie turned to face him and shoved him hard, knocking him to the ground. Bill rushed to Mike's side as Ben held Richie back.

"We all could have died! Eddie could have died! Because you lied about your fucking chode ritual!" He rushed at him again but Ben held his arms down and kept him away.

"I'm sorry! I thought we could make it work! That we could find a way to weaken  **_It_ ** and kill  **_It_ ** ." 

"I weakened  **_It_ ** back at the pharmacy." Eddie said softly, earning their attention. "I had my hands around the lepers throat and I could feel  **_It_ ** choking. He felt so weak. Killable almost." They all traded a look with one another before Ben disappeared into a passageway in the wall.

"If we can trick  **_It_ ** into becoming small, then we can kill  **_It_ ** ." Mike said, his plan filling him with excitement.

"The entrance to the cavern. He'd have to make himself small enough to fit through. Small enough to kill." Bev said, turning to look at the small passageway as Ben reappeared.

"Guys there's a way out through here. Let's go."

The six Losers squeezed through and peeked their heads around the corner almost comically, looking at the clown still trying to fight  **_It's_ ** way inside the cavern they'd been in moments before. They took off running to the original entrance, moving as fast their legs would let them on the rocky floor. They were mere feet away when the clown suddenly jumped in front of them, giggling and talking in a demented way.

"There's more than one way to make someone small." Mike said, a lightbulb going off in his mind. The others looked at him confused except for Bev who nodded.

"Make him believe that he is." 

**_It_ ** started down at them,  **_Its_ ** arms swinging down in front of it and  **_It_ ** sneered. 

"Make me small?  **I AM THE EATER OF WORLDS** !" Mike stared up at  **_It_ ** defiantly.

"Not to us, you're not. You're just a clown."  **_Its_ ** face fell and  **_It_ ** turned towards Bev.

"A weak old woman!"  **_It_ ** shuddered slightly and moved towards Ben who glared at it. 

"A headless boy!"  **_It_ ** growled and Bill cried out next.

"An imposter!"  **_It_ ** was clearly struggling at this point and grunted and shook a bit, clearly unsure of  **_Itself_ ** .

"A mimic!" Ben shouted. "A mimic!" Richie stepped forward and threw another rock at it. 

"A stupid, fucking Paul Bunyan statue!"  **_Its_ ** head shook wildly as  **_It_ ** changed forms rapidly.  **_It_ ** couldn't seem to focus on just one and  **_It_ ** growled loudly. 

**_It_ ** lunged directly towards Eddie who looked  **_It_ ** dead in the eyes.

"A goddamn leper!" 

They continued shouting at  **_It_ ** , the monster vibrating wildly and shrinking in size.  **_It_ ** stumbled backwards and fell down, Richie jumping forward to rip  **_Its_ ** arm off. Bev raised her eyebrows in surprise but continued chanting with the others. 

**_It_ ** fell down finally,  **_Its_ ** form small and almost childlike. They kept saying clown until  **_It_ ** finally landed against the enormous structure, weak and frightened.

"A clown." Mike started, "With a scared, beating heart."

He leaned down and pulled  **_Its_ ** heart from  **_Its_ ** chest. The heart began beating faster as the monster became more terrified of  **_Its_ ** impending doom. The six Losers wrapped their hands around the heart and looked at one another.

"Look at you."  **_It_ ** cooed. "You're all grown up."

They nodded at one another and dug their fingers into the heart. It gushed out clear and black fluids that floated upwards.  **_It_ ** groaned in pain before falling silent. The heart fell apart in their hands and they let go, the pieces floating up. The deadlights above them faded and died, the room returning to a green glow.

Bill and Mike fell against each other, bringing their foreheads together and smiling. Ben wrapped an arm around Bev and held her against him. Richie glanced over at Eddie who was shaking and breathing heavily. He moved towards him but didn't make it a step before Eddie was surging forward and wrapping his arms around him. 

Richie inhaled sharply before wrapping his arms around his smaller friend. He was content to stand there forever in their moment of victory but they were interrupted by the cavern around them beginning to collapse. 

"We've gotta go!" Ben cried out, pulling Bev along behind him toward the exit.

They rushed through the caverns and up back into the cistern where the floating bodies were falling alongside rubble. The water slowed their pace but they managed their way through the tunnels and back into Neibolt. The walls around them crumpled and collapsed as the floor began sinking in. The six of them made it out into the street right as the house completely sunk into the ground, nothing left of it. 

"Holy shit!" Richie said, vaguely aware of Eddie clutching on to his arm. 

"Stan would be so happy to see Neibolt gone." Mike piped up, a small smile on his face.

"Happy? You kidding me? He'd be creaming his khakis." Richie said with a grin.

"Beep beep, Richie." Ben said, chuckling.

The six of them moved away from the house silently. They bypassed their cars and continued down the road. Richie wasn't sure why they all instinctively moved towards the quarry but the next thing he knew, they were peeling layers off and kicking off shoes.

Bev jumped in first, always braver than them. Bill jumped in next, Mike and Ben following after. Richie peeled his shirt off and climbed through the railing. He looked over the edge before glancing back at Eddie who was staring nervously at the railing in front of him. 

"What the fuck are you doing? Climb over." Eddie shook his head.

"Nope. That water is disgusting. We could get dysentery or cholera. Plus, I have a giant open wound in my face. I could get hepatitis A from dirty water." Richie rolled his eyes and walked back over to him.

"Do I have to remind you how brave you are every time you're too scared to do something? Or will you just always be a huge pussy?" Eddie scowled.

"Fuck you, dickwad." 

"I will throw you into that damn quarry or you can jump in yourself. Your choice." Eddie grumbled to himself but climbed through the bars.

He stripped his jacket off and threw it over his head. Richie did a double take at the toned definition of his arms but kept his mouth shut. He glanced over the edge at their friends who were splashing one another and laughing.

"Remember the last time we were here?" Eddie asked softly. 

"No." He looked sad as Richie dropped his dirty shirt to the ground.

"The night before you left for Los Angeles. I remember how sad I was that you were leaving. I thought I was never going to see you again." Richie sighed and patted his back, his hand burning at the contact.

"Well it was only a few decades. Now stop being a downer, Eddie Spaghetti and get in!" He ran forward and leaped into the water, cheering as he fell.

Eddie was behind him in a flash and the six of them paddled out to the middle of the quarry. Once they reached the center, Eddie found a rock to sit on and perched himself there as the others washed themselves off. Bill was scrubbing his hair in the water and he grimaced.

"Why couldn't we just shower at the townhouse? This water is disgusting."

"It's symbolic, dipshit." Richie said, cleaning his broken glasses in the water. 

"Symbolism is crap. Let's go be symbolic somewhere else. Like let's go be symbolic at my townhouse in New York. Where it's clean and sanitary." Bev rolled her eyes.

"If your wife is like your mother, I'll pass on meeting her." She said. They all laughed, save for Eddie who glared at her.

"Myra is a good woman. She's not like my mom at all." Bill snorted.

"No offense, Eds, but she looks exactly like your mom. Except blonde. And without the mustache." Richie laughed hard and held his hand up for a high five from Bill who supplied one. 

"Fuck you, bro! Stop trash talking my wife, Trashmouth." Richie put up his hands defensively. 

"Bill said it, not me. I only thought it." The rest of them laughed hard and Eddie scowled before cracking a small smile.

"There he is!" Bev said, leaning over to hug his leg. "We're sorry. I'm sure she's lovely."

"No. You're right. She sucks." His comment sent them all into fits of laughter so hard, their faces were red and sweaty. 

"Well I'd hope she does. Why else would you marry her?" Bev snorted loudly and slapped the water.

"Shut the fuck up, Rich!" 

They spent the rest of the morning swimming in the warm water, recounting stories from their pasts that were coming back to them faster and faster. Eddie eventually joined them in the water, floating on his back with his eyes closed. Richie subtly watched him, feeling the familiar tugging in his gut he'd felt almost every time he was with Eddie as kids. 

When they'd left the quarry, they returned to Neibolt to fetch their cars. A fire engine and two cop cars were in front of the house, assessing the situation. They seemed confused as to how it suddenly collapsed but the Losers ignored them and headed back to the Inn, Bill following behind on Silver.

The Inn was empty as usual, no sign of owners and guests around. The skateboard that'd been there hours before was gone now. Like it had never been there in the first place. Everyone headed upstairs to their rooms to shower and change but Richie headed straight for the bar. 

He poured himself some bourbon and drank it quickly, grimacing at the burn of the cheap liquor. He poured another glass and turned around to see Eddie leaning against the bar watching him. Richie jumped and swore loudly.

"Fuck, man. Give a guy a warning next time." Eddie sighed and grabbed an extra glass. He held it out to Richie who filled it for him.

"I can't wait to get out of Derry. Lots of good memories here but…" He threw back the bourbon and frowned. "I think the bad ones outweigh them."

"I get what you mean, Eds. But I also have some really good ones here. Shit I'd like to remember. People I'd like to remember." He said the last sentence softly, pointedly avoiding Eddie's gaze. 

"Oh really? You wanna remember us? Not fuck off back to your illustrious career." He laughed dryly.

"Fuck my career. It sucks. I wanted to be famous for  _ my  _ jokes. Not somebody else's." Eddie frowned.

"What are your jokes about?" 

Richie remembered the set he'd written a few years before when he was feeling brave. Brave enough to be emotionally vulnerable but also funny and relatable. A set his manager had told him would flop.

_ "Nobody wants to hear jokes about the life of sad gay guy. They want humor they can relate too. You're a man's man. Act like it, Rich. It's what's best for your career." _

"Nothing important. Just my life and relationships and shit." He drank his bourbon and put the bottle back. 

He moved around the bar and headed towards the stairs but was stopped by a hand on his arm. He turned to see Eddie staring at him sadly.

"You should say what you want, Rich. If your manager tries to stop you, fire him." He pulled his arm away and frowned.

"It's not that easy, Eds."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_ "Why can't it be? What's so fucking difficult about it?" Eddie asked, his chin on Richies shoulder.  _

_ He was watching him play Street Fighter against Bill who was biting his lip and smashing the buttons. His glasses were slipping down his nose and Richie quickly pushed them back up. Eddie was standing on his tiptoes to watch the screen but he didn't mind it. Not since he was leaning on Richie to do so. _

_ "This game requires a certain level of skill and nuance to win, Edster. Skill and nuance I possess." He landed a blow on Bill and his character fell down, announcing Richies victory. "Fuck yeah!" Bill groaned and fist bumped his friend. _

_ "I don't know h-h-how you're so g-good at this. It s-s-s-sucks."  _

_ "Practice, maestro. Much practice." He said in a bad English accent, earning an eye roll from both of his friends.  _

_ "Whatever. I gotta g-go." Bill waved goodbye and ran out the doors, hopping on Silver and speeding off. _

_ Eddie eyed the machine that had two tokens resting on it. Richie spotted him looking and picked one up. He waved in front of his face and grinned. _

_ "Wanna play?" Eddie looked down at his arm that had recently been freed from its cast. _

_ "I do need to strengthen my right arm." Richie laughed.  _

_ "I can think of better things to do with my right arm!" He held his hand up for a high five but Eddie ignored him and snatched the token. _

_ "Do you always have to be so fucking annoying?" Richie pouted and pushed his glasses up again. _

_ "It's a gift."  _

_ Eddie inserted the coin and grabbed the joystick. Richie sidled up next to him and grabbed his joystick again. The game started up and the two of them began playing. _

_ Richie tried to focus on the game but he couldn't help thinking about how close Eddie was to him. How he could smell the potpourri from his house on his skin, the Gain detergent on his clothes, how warm he was pressed up against his side. Eddie suddenly cheered and Richie shook his head in disbelief.  _

_ "I won! Hell yeah!" He laughed and turned to smile at Richie. "Guess I have more skill than you, Trashmouth."  _

_ Richie felt his chest flutter and his cheeks heat and he pushed his glasses up his nose.  _

_ "One loss is nothing. I've still got 98 wins just this year. You've got one." Eddie pouted and grabbed the last token on the console. _

_ "Rematch! If I win, you're buying ice cream." Richie wiggled his eyebrows. _

_ "And if you lose?" Eddie blushed and shoved the token into the machine.  _

_ "I won't lose." _

_ They placed their hands back on the joysticks and buttons and began playing again. Eddie's tongue stuck out of the corner of his mouth as he concentrated, his hands slapping buttons and violently jerking the joystick. Richie glanced over at him and felt his face heat up at the sight. _

_ 'So cute.' He thought before turning his attention back to the game. He was easily kicking Eddie's ass and he could see the early defeat settling in on his face. He groaned internally and intentionally flubbed a few hits and Eddie beat him again. _

_ "Fuck!" Richie shouted, trying to sell his "loss". Eddie turned to him and poked him in the chest with a grin. _

_ "Guess you're buying."  _

_ The two boys wandered out of the theater and grabbed their bikes, Richies keys jingling against the unused game quarters in his pocket. They wandered down the street to the candy store where a big sign in the window announced that ice cream season was almost over. He held the door open for Eddie who bounded in excitedly. He pressed his nose to the glass the ice cream was behind and smiled.  _

_ "Why are you even looking? We always get vanilla." He frowned. _

_ "I don't know. I thought maybe I'd try berry bliss. Or pumpkin! Or rocky road!" Richie reached into his pocket and counted his change. Enough for one cone.  _

_ "What can I get you boys?" The clerk asked, wiping his hands on his apron. _

_ "Can I get a scoop of vanilla?" Richie rolled his eyes and the clerk nodded and quickly served him a cone. He looked at Richie.  _

_ "What about you, son?" He shook his head and handed him the last five quarters in his pocket.  _

_ "Just his cone."  _

_ He handed him his change back and Richie wandered out the door, Eddie on his heels. He was licking the ice cream that was slowly melting down his hand and frowning.  _

_ "Why didn't you get a cone?" Richie shrugged and kicked the ground before picking his bike up.  _

_ "Not enough cheddar, Eds! Hard to make scratch when all I can do mow lawns. Not much grass to mow in October. Gotta wait until the first snowfall before I can start making dough again."  _

_ Eddie held his cone out towards him with a small smile. Richie tentatively grabbed it, fingers brushing against his friends. He took a few licks before handing it back. _

_ The two boys leaned against their bikes and shared the ice cream, enjoying the cool autumn air. When they finished, Richie split the cone in half and they each munched on it. Eddie licked his fingers clean before pulling a baby wipe out of his fanny pack to wipe his hands off. _

_ "Do I have any on my face?" He asked, looking up at Richie with big brown eyes. He nodded and Eddie frowned. "Where?" _

_ Richie leaned forward and licked the ice cream off his cheek, earning a slap on the arm and a disgusted squeal. He frantically wiped his face off with a wipe while glaring at him.  _

_ "Got it."  _

_ "You're so fucking gross." _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Show business is complicated, Spaghetti Head." Eddie laughed. 

"I forgot you used to call me that. I still hate it." He reached out to ruffle his shorter friend's hair and moved towards the stairs.

"I'm conking out. I'm fucking exhausted." Eddie followed after him, separating in the upstairs hall go to their rooms. 

Richie exhaled hard as he closed his door and clutched the wall. 27 years of memories were rushing back and each one seemed to gut him more than the last. He shakily unbuttoned his shirt and threw it in the corner. 

He dressed in a loose shirt and sweatpants and dove into bed. Being awake for more than 48 hours wasn't doing him any favors. His joints cracked as he stretched out across the bed and yawned. He was far from old age but it didn't mean he wasn't starting to feel his age in his knees and hands. 

He wasn't sure when he passed out but when he awoke, it was pitch black outside. Someone was knocking on his door and he shuffled over to it, opening it a crack. Mike smiled at him and Richie scowled.

"I was sleeping." He said, voice rough with sleep.

"Everyone was. But I thought we could all go get dinner." 

"And you couldn't have texted that?" Mike raised an eyebrow.

"Would you have answered?" Richie yawned and ran a hand through his hair.

"That's fair. But we're not eating at Jade."

"No. I'm done with Chinese food for a while."

Richie pulled on a pair of tennis shoes and slipped his wallet and phone into the pockets of his pants. He shuffled into the hallway where Ben was pulling on his boots. He glanced up at his friend and smiled.

"Hey buddy. We were thinking of going out for Italian. You coming?" He nodded and sat down on the railing.

"Why can't we sleep for a few days and get dinner when we wake up?" Ben stopped smiling and stood up. 

"Well we  _ are _ heading to Atlanta tomorrow night. Stan will be out of the hospital by then." Richie blinked quickly and images of his best friend ran through his head.

"Shit. I don't know what it'll be like seeing Stan again. After he…" He trailed off his sentence and looked down at his shoes. Ben clapped him on the shoulder and smiled. 

"I know he'll be happy to see you. You guys were best friends." 

They wandered downstairs where the rest of the Losers were discussing who was going with who in what cars. Richie leaned against the wall and listened to Eddie explain why his car was more sanitary and that it would be smart if he and Mike went together since they both had open wounds. Mike glanced over at Richie and rolled his eyes which earned a chuckle from him. Eddie whipped his head around and glared at him.

"What's so fucking funny?" 

"Just the fact that you think anyone wants to go with you." Eddie lifted his hand and furrowed his brow.

"My car is bigger than yours, asswipe. And definitely cleaner." 

"Not anymore it's not." Eddie looked at him confused. "Didn't I tell you? Yeah your mom squirted all over the backseat last night when I was fucking her. Pussy juice all over your Eddie Money cassettes." Bev laughed and Eddie glared at her.

"That's not fucking funny, dude!" 

"So Eddie and Mike in Eds' car, and everyone else in mine." Bill said, spinning his key ring on his finger. Everyone nodded their agreement and left the townhouse.

The restaurant Mike had chosen was small but fairly busy for a Sunday night. The hostess greeted them and led them to a booth at the back of the restaurant. They all squeezed in together, Mike on Richies right and Eddie on his left. They placed their drink orders and looked over the menus.

"Nothing on here is gluten free." Eddie griped, putting the menu down.

"You don't have a gluten allergy dude. You used to eat shit with gluten all the time as a kid. You won't die if you eat a fucking breadstick." Richie said, picking his menu up and putting it back in his hands.

"Um, I think I know my own body."

"You didn't even know you didn't have asthma until like a day ago." 

The two of them argued for a few moments, everyone at the table laughing and shaking their heads. Bev leaned into Ben's side and put her lips to his ear.

"They still fight like an old married couple." He nodded in agreement and then startled when she pressed a kiss to his cheek. He blushed and she patted his cheek.

They ordered their food and talked loudly over the table waiting for it to arrive. Richie noticed Mike nervously rubbing his hands together and frowned. It was the same look on his face the night at the Jade and he knew that wasn't a good look.

"You ok, Mike?" He asked. Everyone quieted and looked over at their friend. He nodded and smiled.

"Yeah. It's just that there's something I want to tell you all."

"There's not another cosmic alien monster in Derry is there?" Richie asked, half joking.

"No. Nothing like that. I wanted to tell you that," He planted his hands on the table and closed his eyes. "I'm gay."

"Oh, Mikey." Bill leaned over and hugged him tightly, rubbing his back. The rest of the Losers muttered reassurances and Mike grinned.

"We love you, Mike. I'd still nail a bully in the face with a rock if they tried messing with you." Bev said reaching across the table to take his hand.

"Hold up! Why is nobody asking the most important question here?" Richie asked, looking genuinely confused.

"What question?" Ben inquired.

"Did you ever have a crush on one of us?" Everyone laughed and Mike's cheeks darkened from his blush. 

"Leave him alone!" Bev said with a chuckle. Mike chewed on his lip and Richie gasped. 

"Holy shit, you totally did!" He threw up his hands and smiled.

"I did. On three of you actually." 

"I bet you liked me. My Hawaiian shirts and coke bottle glasses were a total fucking turn on, right?"

"I actually never had a crush on you. Trashmouths aren't my type." Richie pouted and crossed his arms, clearly feigning distress.

"Wait! Who did you like?" Ben asked, curious. 

"Well, you actually." Ben blushed and Bev cooed.

"You liked him  _ before _ he got hot?" Richie asked.

"I thought he was cute and sweet, ok? We had a lot in common. But I knew how much he liked Bev and I got over it in a few weeks." Ben was still smiling and blushing and he poked at his food.

"Thanks Mike." 

"Who did you like after Ben?" Eddie asked looking around Richie at Mike.

"Oh definitely Bill. Everyone had a crush on Bill." Bev said.

"I actually had a crush on Eddie for about a year." 

"What?!" Eddie exclaimed, his voice raising an octave. 

"Of course he did, Spaghetti. You've always been the cutest one. Cute, cute, cute!" Richie pinched his cheek and Eddie slapped his hand away.

"But I got over that and crushed hard on Stan for the rest of high school." Richie nodded.

"Makes sense. You've both always been grandpas." 

"Weren't you two in Derry alone for like a year? That must have been hard without the rest of us there as a buffer." Eddie piped up. Mike shook his head with a smile.

"It wasn't that hard."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_ Mike was sure he was going to die any second. He sat, perched on a rock while Stan lay stretched out on a towel. The wind gently lapped at the water in the quarry and the sound had lulled his friend to sleep. He didn't mind it though. It meant he could watch him sunbathe without having to worry about being caught. _

_ But the gentle scene before him didn't make the aching in his chest lessen. Bill had moved away three and a half weeks ago, college on his horizon, which left Stan and Mike behind, the last of the Losers. Nobody there to make the conversation less awkward when Mike stumbled on his words, nobody there to take his attention away when he looked for just a little too long, nobody there but them. _

_ Stan stirred and swatted away a fly that was buzzing around his face. He scratched his stomach and Mike watched the movement, a pull in his groin. He shook his head and looked away, searching for something else to stare at. But his attention was drawn back within a few seconds and he sighed. _

_ He wasn't sure how long he sat there but the sun was slowly beginning to make its way to the west when Stan awoke. He blinked wearily and slowly sat up, stretching his arms out and cracking his back. Mike looked away, pretending to be focused on one of the books Stan had brought with. _

_ "How long was I asleep?" Mike shrugged. _

_ "A few hours. I didn't wanna wake you." Stan stood, picking his towel up.  _

_ "Do you want to eat the lunch I made before it gets soggy?" He headed to the cooler they'd brought before Mike could answer. _

_ He pulled out two sandwiches and handed one to Mike with a soft smile. He felt his heart leap into his throat and he returned the smile, hoping Stan wouldn't notice his blush. They ate in silence, sipping sodas and watching the waves lap at the shore. _

_ "Hey, Mike?"  _

_ "Hmm?"  _

_ "Do you think Bill forgot already?" He sounded sad and Mike shrugged.  _

_"Maybe. Eddie remembered the longest and he's in New York. If it goes off distance like we thought, then...yes. California is all the way at the other end of the country." Stan hummed a strange noise and finished his_ _soda._

_ "Hey, Mike?" Stan asked again. Mike turned to look at his friend who was sitting closer now, their naked thighs touching. He had his elbows straightened as he clutched his knees.  _

_ "Yeah?" Stan squeezed his knees, anxiously. His face reddened and he leaned in a bit closer.  _

_ "Can I kiss you?"  _

_ "What?!" Mike's eyes widened and he stammered. Stans blush brightened and spread to his collarbones and up to his ears. _

_ "I'm sorry! I just thought that maybe you liked me too so…" He buried his face in his hands and groaned loudly.  _

_ "I do." He said it so quietly that Stan was sure he'd heard him wrong. He looked up at him, his brows furrowed and his brown eyes twinkling. _

_ "You do?" He nodded furiously and Stan laughed a bit.  _

_ "Holy shit! I didn't think that you, I mean, I thought you only liked girls." _

_ "I'm gay, Stan. And I've been in love with you for three years." The moment the confession passed his lips, he felt his world implode. All Stan had said was that he liked him and he'd just confessed his love for the 17 year old boy sitting next to him. _

_ "You've been in love with me for three years?" His face was unreadable and Mike was kicking himself, hating his blabbermouth. _

_ "Yes, but I didn't mean to blurt it out like that." He put his hand over Mike's.  _

_ "It's fine, Mikey, because I've been in love with you for five."  _

_ Mike smiled and leaned forward, pressing their lips together. He cupped Stans cheek and let his thumb stroke his face gently. His lips were softer than he'd ever imagined and he felt himself melt. He brought his other hand up place on Stan's thigh and he heard the other boy groan a bit. He pulled back a bit, sighing happily.  _

_ "I really want to keep doing that. Forever." He said softly. Stan grinned and gently kissed him.  _

_ "Then go for it." _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After dinner they all headed back to the townhouse. Everyone shuffled inside, yawning from the large amounts of pasta they'd consumed. Mike wandered over to his car, looking down at his phone. 

"Where ya going, Mikey?" He startled and turned to see Richie following behind him. 

"Home. Why are you following me?" 

"You and Stan, huh?"

"What do you mean?" Mike tried to act dumb but he knew he wasn't convincing his friend. Rich just crossed his arms and stared him down. 

"Stan told me he was…before his Bar Mitzvah. He couldn't stop crying. He thought I would hate him. That we all would." Mike leaned against his car and motioned for Richie to do the same. They stood there silently for a moment. 

"Stan told me that you're bi too." He scoffed.

"Fucking snitch" They both laughed and Mike patted his back. 

"I know you're afraid to tell people. But you can tell the Losers. You know that." Richie was silent for several seconds before he sniffled. Mike realized he was crying and pulled him into his arms. 

He held his friend for a long moment, just rubbing his back and reassuring him. Richie clutched his shirt and sobbed loudly. It was several minutes before he pulled away, wiping his eyes. 

"Well that was fucking embarrassing." 

"You don't need to be embarrassed, man. It's ok." 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_ Richie trudged up the front steps to Stan's house. He wasn't sure why he'd been called over at 10 in the morning on a Saturday but he didn't mind. He knew that Stan likely needed help with the school prep his parents made him do every summer or another one of his exotic bird puzzles. He rolled his eyes at the thought and knocked on the door. Andrea opened it with a smile. _

_ "Good morning, Richie." He shot her a cockeyed grin and adjusted his glasses.  _

_ "Hola, Mrs. Uris. Is Staniel in?" She laughed and nodded. She stepped aside for him to enter and he bowed to her. "Shalom."  _

_ He ran up the stairs and burst into Stans immaculate room. He kicked his shoes off in the hall and padded in, sitting down on his perfectly made bed. Stan stood at his desk, scribbling something on a piece of paper. _

_ "Hey, Rich." He mumbled, turning to face him. He looked scared and his hands shook so much that the paper in his hands wobbled. _

_ "Hey Stan. What's got you bothered?" _

_ "I…" He looked down at the paper and crumpled it up, tossing it in his wastebasket. He crossed his arms and hugged them to his chest. He started crying and Richie sat up quickly. _

_ "Whoa! What's wrong?" That only made his friend cry harder and Richie crossed the room to hug him. Stan buried his face in his shoulder and sobbed, his whole body shaking under Richie's hands. _

_ "Please don't hate me." He managed to get out between sobs. He pulled back sniffling and wiping at his face.  _

_ "Why would I hate you?" _

_ "I…like girls." That confused Richie and he screwed his face up.  _

_ "Why does th-" _

_ "But I like boys too." Stan said, cutting him off.  _

_ "Oh." They were both silent. _

_ Richie wasn't sure what to say. What do you say to something like that? Stan went back to clutching his arms to his chest and he backed away. He sat down on the edge of his bed and stared at the ground. Richie slowly sat down next to him and put an arm around him.  _

_ "I don't hate you. You're my best friend and I love you. No matter how much you like dick." Stan laughed through his tears and shoved Richie.  _

_ Both boys laughed and Richie hugged Stan tightly. As he rubbed his back, only one thought was in his mind. _

_ I can like both? _


	2. Chapter 2

One long conversation later, Mike was headed home and Richie went inside. Eddie and Bill were sitting at the bar and drinking. They were talking quietly and laughing occasionally. Eddie still laughed with his whole body, throwing his head back and slapping his knee. He missed making Eddie laugh like that and his stomach knotted.

He headed up to his room, his stomach still heavy. Every time he thinks he's remembered everything, something happens and dredges up another memory. He rubbed his eyes and yawned. 

His crisis of mind could wait until the morning. His brain and body were screaming for sleep so he kicked his shoes off and climbed into bed. He could faintly hear Bev and Ben giggling next door and he pulled his pillow over his head. 

Richie awoke in the early morning with a shout, drenched in sweat. The sun was shining in through the window and birds were singing sweetly outside. He placed a hand on his chest, willing his heart to slow down. The images from his nightmare danced behind his eyelids and he groaned. 

There was a soft knock on his door a minute later and he stood, moving to open the door. Eddie stood on the other side, his face scrunched up and sleep in his eyes. His hair was sticking up in every direction and his pajamas were too big on him. Richie felt his heart flutter and he smiled.

"What's going on, Spaghetti?" Eddie crossed his arms and frowned.

"I heard you yell. I wanted to make sure you were ok." He seemed genuinely worried and Richie bit back the joke he was about to tell.

"I'm fine, Eds. Just had a bad dream." Eddie nodded.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" 

"You know what, Eds? I really don't." His face fell and he uncrossed his arms to place a hand on Richies arm. He felt his skin heat at the contact and he pulled away. "I'm going back to bed." He shut the door in his face and stared at the closed door, wondering what his face looked like in that moment. 

He felt pathetic. 24 years apart with no memory of one another and he still loved Eddie as much as he did when he was 13. He felt the panic creeping into his chest slowly and he ran over to his bag, pulling a Xanax out of his Altoid tin and swallowing it dry. 

_ You're a mans man, Rich. Act like it.  _

He sat in a chair by the window and crossed his legs, looking out at the sunrise. Some birds fluttered past the window to land in the tree next to the Inn and he thought about how Stan would be staring at the birds, his lower lip between his teeth and a North American birds book open in front of him. 

God, he missed Stan. They'd been inseparable once upon a time. Richie always running headfirst into danger and Stan was the one following behind, clucking nervously like a mother hen. Once they'd befriended Eddie and Bill, Eddie adopted that role which meant Stan could now be the one to roll his eyes and call them all idiots fondly. 

He'd had a crush on him once. It lasted from the age of six until he was eight years old. Then Eddie had entered his life, small, loud, and full of fiery personality, and he knew he'd met the boy who would have his heart forever. He gave Richie something Stan never did and that had made him feel guilty once. But if what Mike had told him about their relationship was true, he was glad Stan had given that to him. 

The sun rose a bit more and he looked away from the window and down at his bag on the floor. It was packed, nearly empty from how quickly Richie had thrown some underwear, a pair of jeans, his Xanax, and his phone charger in there and hopped on the first flight to Derry. He didn't even have a clean shirt and that made him wrinkle his nose. He would have to borrow one from Ben. 

There was another knock on his door but he didn't get a chance to answer it before Bill entered the room. He was carrying two mugs in his left hand and little packets of cream and sugar in his right. He smiled at Richie and offered him one of the mugs. Richie took it and most of the cream and sugar too.

"I booked six tickets to Atlanta for tonight. You can pay me back later."

"It's going to be so fucking awkward, Bill. What do we say? What do  _ I  _ say? What the fuck do you say to someone who tried to kill themself?" Bill pondered that for a moment, sipping his black coffee. Richie took the rest of the cream and sugar. 

"I don't know, Rich. I do know that I'll tell him I love him and that I understand why he did it." Richie took a sip of his coffee and grimaced. 

_ Too bitter. _

"I guess I do too. Still," He put his mug down and looked back out the window. "It's going to be a very fucking difficult conversation."

Ben ended up giving Richie a clean shirt and told him to keep it. He had plenty like it at home. Eddie gave him one of the 15 million hoodies he'd apparently packed and said he'd better return it dry washed. The jacket was white and just a little small but he didn't tell Eddie that. Instead he quickly put it on and breathed in the familiar smell of Gain detergent and potpourri. But on top of this was a new smell. It was the smell of fabric softener sheets, cologne, and the plastic interior of his suitcase. He hoped nobody noticed when he pressed the sleeve to his nose and took a whiff.

Mike ended up driving them all to the airport in his old sedan. The seven of them barely fit in the car but the airport was thankfully only a few miles away. Richie made sure to bitch the entire time but quieted when Eddie told him to shut up from his place halfway in his lap. The Derry airport was quiet, small, and smelled strongly of Dunkin Donuts due to it being the only restaurant in the entire place. They grabbed seats at their terminal, one of only two, and ate breakfast sandwiches for dinner. 

They boarded their flight shortly after, not looking forward to their New York layover that would likely last a few hours. But they didn't care much since Stan would be there at the end of their long trip. When they landed in Atlanta at four the next morning, they collapsed into chairs after collecting their bags. Bill disappeared to the car rental agency nearby and returned with a Honda Odyssey because it was, " _ definitely big enough for all of us _ ." 

The drive to the nearest hotel was long despite how close it was. Everyone in Atlanta seemed to be driving at five in the morning. When they arrived, Bev got their room keys and handed them out. A few hours of sleep before they saw Stan for the first time in years. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_ Stan sat at his coffee table, staring down at the puzzle in front of him. He stared at the gap in between the pieces and frowned. He climbed off the sofa and looked under the table for the piece he seemed to be missing. As he picked it up, the table shook from his phone vibrating. He glanced up at it through the glass to see who was calling. _

_ Unknown Caller, Derry, Maine _

_ He climbed to his feet and put the piece aside. His hands shook as he picked the phone up and answered. _

_ "Stanley Uris speaking" _

_ "It's Mike."  _

_ "I'm sorry?" _

_ "Mike Hanlon. From Derry." _

_ Hand holding, lingering glances, intimate dinners together in Mike's apartment above the library, giggles and touching under covers. I love you's muttered between desperate kisses. _

_ "Mike! God, sorry, yes. Hi! I don't know why I didn't..." His speech was shaky. "How long has it been?" _

_ "A long time. 22 years." He stood and walked towards the window, looking out at nothing.  _

_"_ ** _Its_** _come back, hasn't_ **_It_** _? That's why you're calling."_

_ Mike spoke to him then softly, telling him he needed to come home so they could stop  _ **_It_ ** _. Stan looked down at his shaking hands and felt tears welling up in his eyes. He could hear himself responding to Mike but he couldn't remember what he said. All he could think about was that damned clown. _

_ "I'll see you soon, Stan The Man." He hung up then and Stan wiped at the tears that were threatening to pour out of his eyes.  _

_ He couldn't go back. No matter how much he wanted to see his friends. Or Mike.  _ **_His Mike_ ** _. How could he forget Mike? How could he forget any of them? He looked around his empty house and frowned. _

_ Stan had left Derry in the hopes of finding a better life out there in the world. All he'd gotten was a failed marriage and a big empty house he couldn't even call his home. At least Derry had Mike. _

_ No. He couldn't ever go back. The thought of stepping for in that damned town again flooded his body with terror. He was the weakest link in the chain and he knew he'd be the first to snap.  _

**_We were all together when we hurt it. That's why we're still alive._ **

_ All of them alive could defeat  _ **_It_ ** _ so he had to make sure he wasn't alive. It was the only way. He headed up to his office, pulling six pieces of stationery and six envelopes out of his desk. _

_ A letter for each of them, explaining why he has to do this. He suddenly felt a sense of calm wash over him. This was the cowards way out but if it meant his friends would live, he didn't care. He finished the letters, sealed, and addressed them. Patty would find them later. He had to call her first though.  _

__

_ His hands shook and he dialed Patty's phone number. Even if his ex-wife answered, she wouldn't get there in time to stop him. But he had to apologize to her. She deserved that. _

_ "Hello?" _

_ "Patty. I'm so sorry."  _

_ "For what? What's going on, Stan? Are you ok?" She sounded nervous. _

_ "I could have been a better husband. You deserved a better husband. I'm sorry I couldn't be that for you." He was crying now. _

_ "Stan...whatever it is you're about to do, please don't do it." She pleaded with him but her cries fell on deaf ears. _

_ "Goodbye, Patty."  _

_ "Stan wa-" He hung up and pocketed his phone, heading down the hall to the bathroom. _

_ Stan turned the tap on, letting the bathtub fill with hot water. He hated cold baths. As he undressed slowly, his phone continued vibrating on the counter where it lay. He folded his clothes neatly and piled them on the toilet lid, patting them once to flatten the collar of his shirt.  _

_ The pack of refillable blades for his razors sat on the edge of the tub as he climbed in. The water felt cold on his numb skin despite the steam rising off of it. He let his head fall back as he remembered the day they'd made their promise to one another. _

_ He saw Bill in front of him, stuttering as he asked Stan to promise. Then he was remembering him dragging the blade across his palm as Stan was dragging the blade down his wrist, wincing both times.  _

_ "I swear, Bill." _

_ His vision went dark slowly as he grew numb.  _

_ Cold.  _

_ Tired.  _

_ Loud noise.  _

_ Screaming.  _

_ Someone's screaming. _

_ Who? _

_ Patty? _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mike couldn't sleep. He was sure the others passed out as soon as their heads hit their pillows but he was too wired to sleep. Stan would be in his arms again in just a few hours. He hoped he would be at least.

He'd loved Stan for 25 years. His crush on Eddie had been long but had ended as quickly as it had started when a 15 year old Stanley had asked him to go looking for snowy owls one night in October. He insisted that they were all over the barrens during the fall and he was dying to see one up close. Mike had agreed and had been the only Loser to do so. They'd spent the night on their bellies in the dirt while Stan scanned the trees with his binoculars. Mike had spent the night watching him, his heart swelling. 

When they headed home at six the next morning, Stan was gushing about how he'd seen not one but three snowy owls. Once they'd made it back to their bikes by the road, Stan had hugged him and thanked him for coming with. When he pulled away and his brown eyes met Mike's own, he saw him differently. It was a revelation that said, " _ Oh there you are. I've been looking for you. _ "

He jumped in the shower, scrubbing himself clean. Stan hated dirt. He brushed his teeth afterwards and pulled the ironing board and iron from the closet in his room. He pressed his shirt and pants slowly, making sure there were no creases anywhere. Once he was satisfied with his work, he dressed and looked himself over in the mirror. 

Mike had never thought of himself as being handsome but he didn't think he was unattractive. Stan had always made him feel gorgeous though. Whispering soft affection in his ear, late at night. He always knew what to say to get him to blush. 

There was a sudden pounding on the door.

"Hey Mike! You ready to go, man? It's already after 12!" Richie knocked loudly on his door again. 

"I'm coming!" 

The ride to Stans house felt like an eternity. The city faded away as they slowly headed into suburbs, the houses growing nicer and nicer. Of course Stan had ended up in a nice big house in a classy neighborhood. Mike had never expected anything else.

Bill pulled the van into the driveway of a large two story house. Two big trees were in the front yard, shading the house. Bird feeders hung off shepherd hooks and there was a hummingbird feeder on the front porch. The front door opened and a tall blonde woman stepped out with a smile on her face. She was beautiful in a simple way and her smile almost covered up the exhaustion in her eyes.

"You must be Stans friends. I'm Patty." Mike could see why Stan had fallen in love with her. She was soft spoken and carried nothing but kindness in her every move and smile.

"I'm Beverly. It's nice to meet you." Bev moved forward to shake her hand. The others quickly introduced themselves. 

"Please come inside. I'm sure he'll be happy to see you."

They followed behind her, tension growing between all of them. None of them knew what they'd find inside. A drugged up Stan lying in bed, a shell of who he was. Or a medicated zombie sitting in front of a TV, staring at the screen but not seeing what was playing.

They didn't expect him to pounce on Richie with a hug when they stepped into the living room.

"Richie Tozier!" Richie was surprised for a moment but wrapped his arms around him quickly and lifted him off the ground.

"Staniel!" They both laughed and Richie put him down with a smile.

"It's so good to see you! I saw your comedy special on Netflix last night. You're still not funny." He said with a smile that made the corners of his eyes crinkle. Richie pulled him into a headlock and tousled his curly hair. 

"Fuck you, Urine! You can blame my writers for that!" Patty watched them with a smile before grabbing her purse off the counter.

"Well I'm heading out now. Will you be ok, Stan?" His smile faded a bit and he smiled.

"Yeah. Go home to Rod. I'll see you later." She kissed his cheek and waved goodbye to the others before leaving.

Stan hugged the rest of the Losers with a smile still on his face. Mike wasn't sure but it felt like he hugged him the longest. They all arranged themselves around his living room, Mike picking the seat on the sofa next to him. 

"So…it's over, right?" His hands were shaking as he asked. Mike patted his shoulder and nodded.

" **_It's_ ** dead, Stan. We killed  **_It_ ** ." He smiled again but this time it didn't reach his eyes. 

"I'm sorry for what I did. It was cowardly." The Losers shook their heads and all uttered their disagreements. 

"You're a lot of things, Stanilaus. Cowardly is not one of them." Richie said with a smile. "One of them is brunet though. What the fuck happened to your hair, dude? Box dye?" The tension in the room dissipated instantly and they all laughed.

"Oh shut up, Tozier. It's called genetics." He ruffled his brown curls and caught Mike watching him and he smiled. "You're all so different but still the same. Where'd you all end up?"

They caught up with Stan, discussing college, marriage, divorce, their careers. He had become a partner the year before at the accounting firm he'd worked at since he was 25. He beamed talking about his job and they knew it was more than just a job for him. It was his passion.

"Wait! You're  _ not _ a doctor, Eddie?" Stan asked, a confused smile on his face.

"No. I'm a risk analyst. I work for a big insurance firm and I-"

"Oh my God, your job is so boring!" Richie interrupted and Eddie glared at him. 

"You're such a fucking dick, dude!"

"That's my name, don't wear it out!"

The seven of them talked into the late hours of the night. Bill yawned, setting off yawns from all of them. Bev stood and stretched and smiled at Stan.

"Ok we're all about to pass out. I think it's time we headed back to the hotel." Stan stood and pulled Bev into a hug. The others stood, giving Stan warm hugs except for Mike who stayed back. Stan turned to hug him too but noticed the distance and frowned.

"Are you alright, Mike?" Mike nodded quickly.

"I'm fine." The others moved to grab their jackets and move towards the front door but Stan and Mike stood there, looking at one another. "I'll catch up with you all later. I think I'm going to stay a little longer."

The Losers traded a confused look with each other, save for Richie who winked at the two of them. They said their goodbyes and shuffled out the door, Richie throwing Mike a supportive thumbs up. The door clicked shut and Stan immediately rushed forward, wrapping his arms tightly around Mike's waist and burying his face in his chest.

' _ He's holding me. He's holding me. He's holding me.' _

"I missed you, Mikey. Even though I couldn't remember, I missed you." Mike squeezed Stan closer to him and they stood there for a long moment, silent. 

"I missed you too, Stan." Mike eventually whispered, his lips against the top of Stans head. 

Stan pulled back after a few minutes and turned away awkwardly. He sat back down on the couch and Mike took the seat next to him, their knees touching. Neither one of them spoke for a long time. Mike could hear the clock on the wall ticking and he counted the seconds, 87 of them, until Stan finally spoke. 

"I should never have left Derry. I could've gotten my degree at Derry Community College and stayed with you. I was selfish. You shouldn't have had to-" Mike leaned forward and kissed him then, silencing his panicked and guilty rambling. He pulled away almost immediately though realizing his mistake. 

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I just...I missed you so much." Stan touched his lips and smiled. He grabbed the front of Mike's shirt and pulled him forward again. Their lips met and Mike had to fight back the smile that was threatening to burst across his face. 

Their mouths fit together perfectly still. Like puzzle pieces. Mike didn't want the moment to end. Stan suddenly hissed and looked down at his arm. Blood was seeping through his shirt sleeve and he frowned. 

"Shit." He rolled his sleeve up and glared at the bandage on his arm. It was soaked with dark blood and he stood, heading to the kitchen.

"Are you ok?" Mike followed behind him, worried. Stan nodded and pulled a first aid kit out of the cabinet above his stove. He peeled the bandage off and pulled out a new one. He cleaned his arm and held a bundle of gauze to his arm, wincing in pain. After the bleeding stopped, he peeled the wrapper of the new bandage and taped it down quickly. He threw the old one out and washed his hands once.

"I'm fine. It's not the first time it's happened. All the moving around and excitement must have irritated my stitches." He pulled his sleeve down and turned his back to Mike. He took a few steps forward and placed a hand on his lower back, leaning down to kiss his temple. 

"Stan, please look at me." He sighed but turned to face him, tears in his eyes. "It's ok." He nodded and took Mike's hand. 

"We should talk." 

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Richie laid on his bed, staring up at the popcorn ceiling of his hotel room. There was a small stain there and he wondered what the hell had happened in the room. Maybe a crazy party. Or an anniversary spent together away from kids that got a bit too sexy. 

Someone knocked on his door and he sat up with a frown. It was three in the morning and someone was knocking? If he had been asleep, he might have been angry. 

He opened the door fully prepared to chew out whoever was there but stopped at the sight of a scowling Eddie. He pushed past Richie into the room and began pacing, his fingernail between his teeth.

"Where's the fire, Eds?" Eddie glared at him. 

"Do you remember the night before you left for L.A at all?"

' _ Every second. _ '

"Not really." Eddie sighed and moved to sit down at the desk in the small room.

"I feel like a moron. I don't know why I thought…" 

"Have you been thinking about it a lot?" He nodded and pulled his fingernail out of his mouth.

"I just can't stop thinking about it. Not since I remembered." Richie sat on the bed and scuffed the carpet. 

"What exactly happened that night?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_ The quarry was quiet. The moonlight reflected off the dark water and Richie scowled at the sight, taking another sip from his flask. The metal flask was filled with whiskey stolen from his father's liquor cabinet. He wasn't worried about him finding out. He was leaving the next morning anyways.  _

_ The sound of gravel crunching snapped him out his thoughts and he turned to see Eddie approaching. He had a bottle in his hand and he dangled it with a stupid grin on his face.  _

_ "It's not whiskey but it'll still get ya drunk!" He said with a laugh. Richie plucked the bottle from his hand as he sat next to Richie on the ground. It was a half empty bottle of peach schnapps and the cap was screwed on wrong. _

_ "Looks like you've already had some." Eddie looked sheepish and shrugged. _

_ "Just a little."  _

_ "Half the bottle is more like it."  _

_ He put the bottle down between his knees and went back to nursing his whiskey. Eddie leaned against him and Richie could smell the fruit brandy on his lips. His head lolled on his shoulder and he sighed loudly, pulling his knees up. _

_ "Why are you leaving, Rich?" His voice sounded small and Richie could feel his heart breaking at the thought of leaving him behind. _

_ "I've gotta get out of here, Eddie-bear. You've heard the shit people say about me. The rumors. ' _ **_Richie Tozier sucks flamer cock!'_ ** _ " He raised his hands and spread them wide as if advertising a headline. He lifted his head and looked at Richie with a frown.  _

_ "Doesn't mean I believe them." He took another sip of his whiskey and smiled down at him.  _

_ "What if they were true?" Eddie inhaled sharply and noticed the position they were currently in. He sat up and pulled away from Richie who chuckled wryly. "That's what I thought." _

_ "You're a homo?" He seemed angry now, staring at Richie with an anger in his eyes he'd never seen before. _

_ "I guess. I mean I like girls too but I like boys mo-" Eddie slugged his arm and he cried out. He rubbed the spot on his arm with a pout. _

_ "Why didn't you tell me sooner?! We're supposed to friends!" Richie frowned. He was angry at him for not telling him?  _

_ "You don't hate me for being a queer?" He shook his head and threw his arms around his neck, pulling him into a tight hug. _

_ "I could never hate you, Rich." He said it softly in his ear, his lips brushing his cheek as he did.  _

_ He pulled away and before Richie could say anything, Eddie was kissing him. His mouth tasted like the cheap liquor and it instantly became his favorite flavor. He was frozen in shock but quickly reacted when he felt Eddie pull back a bit. The kiss was hot and desperate as if he had wanted to do this for forever. He knew he had but Eds? This was a surprise. _

_ "Oh God, Richie. I don't want you to go." He said, pulling back. His voice cracked and he bit back a sob.  _

_ "I've got to. I can't deal with the whispers, and stares, and the insults anymore. It's gonna kill me to stay, Eddie." He whispered the last part and wiped at his own face. "Great now I'm crying." They both laughed through their tears. _

_ Richie hugged Eddie tightly and let the smaller boy bury his face in his neck. They sat together in silence for a long time, Richie silently rocking his friend in his arms. He lifted his head finally and smiled at Richie, stroking his cheek. _

_ "Can you kiss me again?" _

_ "Oh shit yeah!" _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"We were drunk. I'm not surprised you don't remember. It's fine. Forget I mentioned it." He stood and moved towards the door but Richie jumped up in front of him, stopping his exit.

"I wasn't drunk. I remember."

"Why'd you say you didn't?" 

"Because I didn't know what you'd do if I said I remem-

Eddie kissed him. It was a soft peck, his lips barely brushing Richie's. He backed away, his cheeks burning. Richie stared down at him before throwing his hands up.

"Oh my fucking God! Why did you do that?!" His eyes were wide and he ran his hands through his hair. "I mean I think I know why you did but you shouldn't have!" Eddie was watching him yell at himself with a concerned frown.

"Richie, it's ok."

"Is it?! Because I'm pretty sure I just kissed a married man! I wanted to do it but still!"

"Why are you freaking out?" Richie turned on his heels and stared at him. 

"BECAUSE YOU'RE MARRIED! I can't go off kissing married guys! Not again!" Eddie put a hand on his arm to try and calm him down before giving him a puzzled look.

"Wait, again?" 

"Holy shit this is insane!" 

"Richie, it's ok. I'm not mad." He put a hand on his hip and ran his hand through his hair again. Eddie stepped forward and moved his hand down Richie's arm and took his hand. "I wanted to kiss you. I'm the opposite of mad right now." He pulled his mouth back down to his own and he felt the taller man melt and he wrapped his arms around his waist and pulled him close. Richie groaned and pulled away.

"Damn it! Stop doing that!" Eddie ignored him and kissed him again and Richie moaned. He pulled him close and kissed him harder, his tongue slipping into his mouth. Richie squeaked in surprise but didn't pull away. 

His hands went to Richie's hips and he let his fingers brush the skin just under the hem of his shirt. When he wasn't stopped, he moved his hands up further. His stomach was soft compared to his own toned stomach and he loved it. Richie moved his mouth to Eddie's throat and nibbled at the velvet skin below his jaw.

"Jesus." He moaned.

"It's Richard, actually. Although I can see how you might get us mixed up." He laughed and Richie kissed his cheek. He turned away from Eddie and fixed his shirt. 

"Did I do something wrong?" Richie spun back around and shook his head vigorously. He grabbed his hands and smiled.

"No!" He kissed him gently and Eddie sighed. "It's just...I know where this is headed. And God I want to so bad, Eds. I have since we were 13. But I can't. Not while you've got a wife at home who's waiting for you." 

"Wait, you don't want me because I'm married? Since when do you have morals?" Richie squinted at him and laughed sarcastically. 

"Very funny, Eds. But I'm not some side piece. I won't be one." His voice cracked and he blinked away the tears in his eyes. Eddie nodded and gently took Richies hand again. 

"I'm gay." He exhaled heavily and his hands shook. He'd never said it aloud before. Only to himself when his wife was kissing him or when his face was between her legs. "Fuck me! I can't believe I said it! I've never actually said it before!"

"I'm bisexual." Eddie looked up at him and pulled his mouth back down to his. Richie eagerly reciprocated this time. 

When someone came pounding on his door 8 hours later, he sat up from his bed with a scowl. It disappeared from his face when he looked down at the arm still draped over his stomach. Eddie was asleep next to him, face in the pillow and drool dripping from the corner of his mouth. He smiled and moved a short lock of hair out of his face and Eddie stirred a bit before settling back down again.

Whoever was at the door knocked again and he gently moved Eddie's arm and shuffled over to the door. He cracked it open and glared at the source of the knocking. Ben smiled at him and held out a bag, emblazoned with a Rogan & Marsh boutique logo. 

"Wha?" He asked, his speech muffled and his mouth dry. 

"I know you haven't gone shopping yet so Bev and I went out this morning and got you some stuff. You're lucky you have a friend with her own store, otherwise you'd be owing us like a thousand bucks." He handed him the bag and Richie peeked inside. Bev had designed some nice shit. "I mostly got stuff around my size since we're around the same weight and height."

"Thanks, Haystack." The bed behind him creaked and both of their eyes widened. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't know you had company. I'll go!" He jerked a thumb over his shoulder and stumbled backwards, turning in a circle awkwardly before pointing down the hall towards the elevator and rushing away. Richie closed the door and laughed quietly. 

"Who's at the door, Rich?" He walked back around the corner and showed off the bag.

"Ben was dropping me off some free swag from Bev's store. Aren't they a pair?" He nodded and yawned, stretching his arms above his head. His naked chest was covered in light pink marks and he felt proud that he'd put them there. 

"What're you smiling at, dickface?" Eddie's eyes were half open and his nose was scrunched up. 

"How stupid you look with your bed head. It's sticking up everywhere."

"Fuck off, man." He attempted to fix his hair but his efforts did nothing. Richie dropped the bag on the TV stand and climbed back into the bed. He ruffled his hair, ignoring his protests.

"I'm making it better. Trust me." He licked his palm and brought it towards his hair. Eddie shouted and slapped his hand away. 

"Don't fucking touch me! I'll kill you!" His face was red and Richie grinned lasciviously.

"If you kill me, then who will give you these sweet and tender kisses. " He licked up the side of his face to his temple which earned him a hard punch in the shoulder. 

"I don't need you to kiss me. You're not the only man in the world!" 

"Yeah but I'm the hottest."

"That's debatable." Richie feigned offense and gasped. 

"Hey! I'll have you know that Buzzfeed voted me the hottest comedian on one of their listicles!" Eddie scoffed. 

"I wouldn't call them a reputable news source." He threw his legs over the side of the bed and stood. He shook his pants legs out and picked up his shirt. As he pulled it over his head, he caught Richie watching him. "It's still early, Rich."

His tone was suggestive but Richie shook his head. Nothing was changing his mind. 

"Nope!" He said cheerfully, his lips popping the ' _ p _ '. "I told you last night, Eds. No bumping uglies until you're single." 

"Kissing another man is still cheating, you know?"

"Yeah but it doesn't make  **_me_ ** feel bad so I'm cool with it." He leaned up towards him and puckered his lips. Eddie put his hand over his face and pushed him away. 

"I'm hungry. What time do you think the restaurant downstairs stops serving breakfast?" He asked, picking up the room service menu. 

"It's like five to 12, dude. There's no way they're still serving it." 

He sat back down and looked over the menu. Richie crawled over to him and kissed the back of his neck. Eddie breathed out a laugh and turned his head to capture his lips with his own. 

Eddie's phone buzzed and he sighed and turned to look at the screen. The caller ID was lit up with Myra's name and face and he grabbed it, answering immediately. 

"Hello, Myra." Richie leaned back on his legs and watched Eddie nervously talk to his wife. 

" _ Eddie! You're not answering my calls and messages! Are you ok? You've been gone for a week! _ "

"Less than five days, Myra. And I'm fine. I'm visiting my friend in Atlanta." 

" _ Atlanta?! _ " She shrieked. He pulled the phone away from his ear a bit and looked at Richie who was cringing at her loud shouting. " _ You said you were going to Maine! _ " 

"Well I did but my friend had an emergency so we came down to visit him."

" _ Eddie, honey, you have to communicate with me! How am I supposed to know you're safe when you're dodging my calls?! _ " He sighed and groaned loudly.

"Myra, I said I was fine! Stop shrieking! I can barely hear myself think!"

" _ Why are you yelling at me?! I'm worried about you, Eddie-bear! _ " He grimaced at the nickname.

"I'm coming home tonight. We need to have a nice, long talk, Myra." He hung up the phone then, holding the power button down until it prompted him to shut it down. His finger hovered over it for a moment before coming down and pressing it. His hands shook and he threw the phone on the bed.

"Eds-" Eddie held up a hand and shook his head. 

"Not now, Richie. I need to pack." He swiped his phone off the bed and slipped his sneakers on, rushing out of the room. 

Eddie left the hotel quickly after his phone call, none of the Losers even realizing he was gone until Bev had gone to grab him for lunch. The clerk at the front desk informed them all he'd checked out 20 minutes after noon.

Mike had also been missing from his room but Richie solved that mystery quickly by loudly announcing that he was probably still with Stan. The others had been confused at his comment and he quickly realized his mistake.

"Why would he still be with Stan?" Ben asked. Richie stammered and Bev squinted at him. 

"Yeah, Richie. Why?" 

"I fucked up." He answered, covering his face and sighing loudly. "In more than one way."


	3. Chapter 3

The Losers split up a day later. Richie flew first class back to L.A where he was immediately recognized upon stepping out of the airport. He'd forgotten how nice it was to not be bombarded by strangers every second of every day. His publicist and manager had both shown up at his house shortly after he arrived home. 

"Richie!" Steve, his manager, had said the minute he'd bounded through the door. "Where have you been, bud?"

"You can't just disappear off the face of the planet like that. At least not without warning us first." His publicist, Jason, had added.

"Well funnily enough, I don't owe either of you explanations for my behavior. If I wanna fuck off to the other end of the country, I can." He was practically shouting at them and Steve threw his hands up defensively. 

"What's up with the attitude? Is it the rumors that are bothering you?" 

"What rumors?" His voice dropped and he turned to look at Jason. Jason and Steve traded an uncomfortable look. "What rumors?!"

"Just look." Steve handed his phone over with several articles already pulled up in his browser.

**_"Richie Tozier seen getting cozy with fashion designer, Beverly Marsh!"_ **

"Oh you've got to be fucking kidding me!" He exclaimed as he scrolled through the article talking about his trip to Atlanta, several pictures of the Losers together, and several of him and Bev together. People were speculating about her marital status and what Bill, Richie, and Bev were doing together in Georgia. 

"It could be worse. At least TMZ isn't trying to guess your sexuality anymore!" Steve said with a grin.

"He's right. This is good for business. People will get to talking about you, start googling you, and see you're going on tour again soon. Boom! Tickets start selling."

"Yeah but I don't Bev pulled into this. She's in a good relationship and I don't want something like this fucking everything up." Steve waved him off.

"She'll be fine. There'll be a few mean comments online and that's it." Richie handed him his phone back and sat down on the back of his couch. 

"I should do something. I love Bev and I don't want her dragged into this. I should come out." Steve and Jason both shouted ' _no_ ' at the same time which earned them both a shit eating grin from Richie. 

"We've discussed this, Rich. You cater to a certain demographic and coming out could lose that demographic." Steve explained in the voice he used when he was trying to talk Richie out of doing something. It usually worked.

"Yeah, Steve. I know what my demo is! You don't have to baby talk me." He smiled apologetically and nodded.

"You're right and I'm sorry. I just want you to think about your career and the impact something like this might have on it. This last tour was your most successful one yet! You are killing it in the comedy business right now. Why ruin it?"

Richie understood where he was coming from. Despite an ever changing culture of acceptance and tolerance, there were still a ton of shitheads out there. Ones who'd seek to ruin his career, who would demonize him online, who would try to paint him in a bad light. 

Coming out now would be a turning point for him. He just wasn't sure if that was in a positive or negative direction. He pulled out his phone and looked down at his lock screen. It was a photo of The Losers as kids. He smiled at it for a moment before unlocking it and pressing down on the home button.

"Hey Siri!" His phone dinged and he smiled at both of the men in front of him. "Text Harry from TMZ,  _ 'Hey Harry, it's Richie. I'm not dating Beverly Marsh. But I am bisexual if you want to try running that instead. xoxo Gossip Girl' _ ." 

Steve and Jason stared at him slack jawed. He pocketed his phone again and pursed his lips. 

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" They both shouted in unison. Steve ran his hands through his hair while Jason started pacing, immediately texting people on his phone.

"Do you realize what you've done, Rich?!" Steve's voice was strained and Richie almost felt bad for the stress he was causing them both. 

"Yeah I do. Now while you two try to put a positive spin on this, I'm going to order ramen and rent Aladdin. Please leave." 

As the two of them rushed out of his house, phones in hand, he looked down at his phone where Siri had displayed on screen that there was no Harry in his phone. He laughed a little before pulling up his texts and messaging Mike. 

**_Richie:_ ** _ how crazy would it be for me to come out on Twitter right now? _

**_Mike:_ ** _ It would certainly be sudden. Are you sure you want to do that? It could mess with your career. _

**_Richie:_ ** _ if ellen page and anderson cooper can come out, why not me? _

**_Mike:_ ** _ No offense, Rich but they're way more famous than you.  _

**_Richie:_ ** _ would you come out if you were in my position? _

**_Mike:_ ** _ Why does it matter what I think? You should do what makes you happy. Fuck everybody else. _

**_Richie:_ ** _ that's true.  _

**_Richie:_ ** _ thanks mikey. i love you _

He pulled up Twitter and started at the blank tweet in front of him for a long time. He knew that once he started typing, he wouldn't stop. His fingers hovered over the keyboard before he typed out a short tweet and hit the upload button. 

His phone began buzzing from notifications within a few seconds and he smiled before pocketing his phone. Letting the internet explode for a while would be fine.

\--------------------------------

Mike put his phone back in his pocket and turned to look over at Stan who was typing away at his computer. His glasses were folded up in his breast pocket and a single curl was resting on his forehead. He glanced over his shoulder and smiled at Mike.

"I can feel your eyes burning a hole in the back of my head. I told you I'm almost done." 

"That's what you said an hour ago. I'm beginning to think we're not getting dinner." Stan sighed and closed his laptop. He stood up from his seat at the island and stretched. His joints popped and he sighed.

"I think I sat for too long. My legs are asleep." He walked over to Mike and patted the top of his head. "Let's go. I'll probably walk like a baby deer all night though." He laughed and stood from the couch, offering his hand. Stan threaded his fingers through Mike's and smiled. 

"Come on, Bambi. Thai food awaits." 

The drive to pick up their food was short and Stan talked about a client he had to drop the whole time. Their stop after the restaurant was a nature preserve close by with picnic spots and trails that they'd walk to burn off the many carbs they'd be consuming.

By the time they reached one of the small picnic spots, the sun was moving slowly across the sky. It was getting low in the sky but still high enough that it'd be there for a few more hours. Mike pulled the cartons out of the bag and placed them on the tablecloth Stan had put over the picnic table. 

"I love coming here. There are so many herons down by the waterfront in the early morning." 

"Do you do a lot of bird watching here?" Stan smiled sadly and shook his head.

"Every once in a while. Work keeps me pretty busy though."

"Well you've still got plenty of time off. Maybe we could come out here soon." Mike suggested, taking a drink. 

"Do you remember when we told our families we were going to the barrens to " _ bird watch _ " but we actually just spent the whole night making out?" Stan said, smiling at the memory. 

"Yes! I think I had like 12 hickeys by the time I got home." They both chuckled and shook their heads.

"Do you remember when your parents went on that two week long cruise around the holidays and you stayed home?" Stan blushed and nodded.

"Oh my God! I think we had sex in like every room. I had to clean everything."

"It was a good two weeks." Mike said with a smirk.

"I was so nervous being alone like that for the first time. I don't think my OCD was ever as bad as the week leading up to them leaving." He rested his hand on top of Mike's and smiled. "You helped so much though."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_ Mike sat at his desk, book in hand. The benefits of working and living in the library was that he never had to worry about returning books late. In fact, he didn't even check them out. Although that was a secret he'd take to the grave. There was a thump outside his door and he lowered the book curiously. _

_ The door swung open and Stan stepped in, flakes of snow resting on top of his curls. He was bundled up in his winter wear and he pulled his mittens off, hanging them carefully on the hooks by the door. He peeled off layers until he was standing there in his light brown sweater and corduroy pants. His shoes were missing but that wasn't an unusual sight. Stan always took them off before entering someone's home, no matter what their policy on shoes in the house was. _

_ "I'm cold." He said softly, rubbing his hands together. His nose was red and Mike grinned at the sight.  _

_ "If you'd called me, I would have picked you up." Mike put his book down and headed to the stove, putting the kettle back on from earlier. Stan crossed the room and wrapped his arms around his waist, burying his face between Mike's shoulder blades. He was ice cold but Mike didn't say anything. He just loved having him pressed against him.  _

_ "Well I had good news. I didn't want to wait." _

_ "Oh?" He turned to face Stan who smiled up at him.  _

_ "My parents are going on a cruise right before Christmas. Which means I'll have the entire, central heated house to myself for all of winter break. Maybe we could have a Christmas dinner. Just us. It would mostly be for you though because..." He gestured to himself as Mike chuckled and kissed his forehead. _

_ "That sounds great, babe." Stan blushed and wrapped his arms around Mike tighter. _

_ The kettle whistled behind him and he turned back around. He pulled it off the burner and clicked it off. He pulled a clean mug out of the cabinet and poured the water in, adding a tea bag once it was filled. He let it steep a moment before passing it to Stan who wrapped his cold fingers around it eagerly. Mike topped off his own mug before moving back to his desk.  _

_ There were no footsteps following him and he turned to see Stan checking the burner. He caught Mike looking and looked down, ashamed.  _

_ "Thank you." Mike offered but Stan just walked over to the dining table and sat down.  _

_ "Mike," He started, anxiously tapping his feet. "I need to say something." Mike moved to the chair next to him and put a hand on his knee. _

_ "What is it?" _

_ "I'm sorry. For being the way I am. I know it's annoying." Mike opened his mouth but Stan held up his hand. "I know it's frustrating when I say I need five more minutes and come out a half hour later because my collar wasn't flat enough. Or when I double, triple check the burners even if they haven't been turned on that day. And I know it's a pain when I wash my hands one, two, three times because they just weren't clean enough the first time. I know there's something wrong with me. I can feel it. I know it got worse after  _ **_It._ ** _ And I'm sorry." Mike leaned in and kissed him. _

_ "You don't have anything to apologize for." Stan smiled. _

_ "I also want to thank you though. For always taking my hand when I'm late and saying " _ let's go _ " instead of " _ took you long enough _ ". Or for just thanking me for double, triple checking the burners instead of rolling your eyes. And when I'm done washing my hands, you're always there with lotion because you know how dry my hands get."  _

_ "Stan, I love you. More than anything in this entire world. I don't know how tough it is to be you but I can see how much you struggle." He paused and tilted Stan's chin up so he would look at him. "Do you remember when you asked to come over after you failed that bio test last month? You disappeared into my bathroom for two hours. When I checked on you, you were scrubbing the grout with a cotton swab. Your fingers were bruised from how hard you were scrubbing and your eyes were red and swollen. But I didn't stop you because I knew that would make things worse." Stan laughed through the tears streaming down his face and nodded, remembering.  _

_ "I remember coming out and you were waiting for me with a cup of water and a sandwich." _

_ "That's what I'm saying Stan. No matter how bad things get, I'll always be on the other side of the door waiting for you." He leaned forward and cupped Mike's face. He put their foreheads together and they sat in silence for a moment before Stan closed the gap and kissed him.  _

_ His kiss was desperate and he clung to Mike's shirt, opening his mouth to let Mike slip his tongue in. He let Mike's hands go to his waist and he straddled his lap, wrapping his arms around his neck.  _

_ Mike knew this was different than all the other times they'd kissed. Stan never held onto him like this or rolled his hips like this or… _

_ "I want you, Mike." He whispered, his lips brushing against his ear. It sent a shiver up his spine and he smiled. _

_ "Are you sure? We've never…and you said you weren't ready yet." Stan kissed him again, hard and Mike bit back a moan. _

_ "I am now. I love you." _

_ Mike stood, holding onto Stan as he did. They kissed again, hot and hard, and this time he didn't stifle his moan. He carried him into his small bedroom and laid him on the bed, looking down at this boy who he'd loved for three years. Stan blushed under his intense gaze and smiled. He brought his hands up, slipping them under his sweater. He loved the feel of Mike's strong, toned body under his hands.  _

_ Mike pulled his shirt over his head and threw it aside, leaning down to press his lips to Stan's throat. No hickeys. Not where his parents could see. He fingered the hem of his sweater and looked to him for permission. Stan sat up a bit and let Mike gently pull the sweater and accompanying shirt over his head.  _

_ He'd seen Stan shirtless dozens of times. He left him breathless every time though and he pressed a kiss to his bare chest. Stan laughed a short breathless laugh and ran a hand over his hair. He looked up at him, confused at his laughter. _

_ "You're so gorgeous." It was Mike's turn to blush and Stan sat up, pressing kisses to his jaw and collarbones.  _

_ Stan moved his hand to Mike's belt and undid it with trembling hands. He unbuttoned his pants and slipped his hand in, palming his erection with a smile. Mike gasped at the sensation and Stan took that as a welcome sign to put his hands down his boxers.  _

_ And then, oh God. His hands were on him, stroking him, touching him, and Mike was sure he was in paradise.  _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I mostly remember a lot of touching and grinding." Stan laughed and nodded. 

"That's mostly what I remember too."

They finished their food, reminiscing about their past together. Stan threw away the garbage and held out his hand for Mike to take. He grabbed it and the two of them began walking the path together. 

The paths were covered in dry leaves that Mike made sure to crunch under his boots. Birds were scattered throughout the trees, peeping softly to one another and Stan felt a sense of overwhelming peace. He leaned in closer to Mike and sighed happily. The taller man looked up from the leaves he was stepping on and smiled down at him.

"What?"

"I never loved Patty like this. I loved her just as much but in a different way. You make me feel safe and happy. I've missed this." Mike leaned in and placed a soft kiss on his lips. Stan put his hands on his hips and pulled him close, kissing him harder.

"Whoa! We might need to get out of public if this is going where I think it's going." He raised an eyebrow and Stan laughed as he shook his head.

"You're as bad as Richie." Mike's eyes widened.

"Take it back." 

"Come on, we've still got two miles to walk."

Five days later, Mike was packing up the few things he had in his hotel room and moving them down to his car. He checked out, leaving with a complimentary robe that he threw out once he was out of sight from the receptionist. His cheap pajamas were softer than the sandpaper robes they gave out. 

He threw his things into his trunk and started the drive out to Stan's house. They both knew today was a goodbye but Mike was dreading it. Being back together again was a dream come true but he still had so much world to see. 

Stan was already on the porch with a glass of iced tea in his hand. Mike climbed out of the car and crossed the lawn to him. He turned away and sat down on the porch swing before Mike could even climb the steps. He sat down next to Stan who looked out at the bird feeder next to the enormous tree on his front lawn and smiled. 

"I know they're considered an invasive species but I think sparrows are one of my favorites. They're so resilient and even when all the other birds are gone, you can always find a sparrow."

"Are we actually talking about birds right now?" Stan smiled and looked back at Mike.

"Of course." He nodded and looked at the various finch types that were pecking at the seed in the feeders. 

"What are the little yellow ones called?"

"You don't have to leave." Mike frowned.

"I love being here, Stan. I love being with you. I love you." 

"But?" Stan asked, expression serious.

"There are so many states in this country and so many countries in this world. I've seen so little of it. I want to experience new foods and cultures and music and…" He trailed off and rubbed away the tears that had sprung to his eyes. Stan pulled his hand away and kissed the back of it. 

"Then go! See the world! Go to California, and Mumbai, and Sydney! Explore as much of this planet as you can while you're still young." He touched one of the wrinkles on brow and grinned. "Well, mostly young."

"I don't know if I'll ever get to Sydney but I think California is a good start. I'll bully Richie into letting me stay with him to save some money."

They sat together for a while, talking softly. When the sun finally dipped behind the sky, Mike stood and straightened his shirt. 

"Time to see where the road takes me." Stan stood as well and yawned.

"It's a bit late to leave. Do you want to head out in the morning?" He laughed and nodded. 

"Yeah. It's probably better if I leave tomorrow."

\--------------------------------

Richie awoke to pounding on his front door and he sat up quickly. The room spun and he clutched his head. The moon was high in the sky outside his huge bedroom window and he looked over at his alarm clock. The green LED lights told him it was after four and he groaned.

The knocking started again and he threw aside his blanket. He shuffled across the room and grabbed his metal bat before heading to the front door. He thought about looking through the peephole but he'd seen horror movies and he wasn't getting a bullet through the eye.

"Who is it?" 

"Jesus Christ, Tozier! Open the fucking door!" Eddie's familiar voice called out through the door. He put the bat down and opened the door, confusion etched across his face.

"What the fuck? I have so many questions."

"I left Myra, I quit my job, I cashed out my savings, and I flew out here to see you. Any more questions?" He shook his head. "Good!" Eddie replied before pulling Richie in for a kiss.

Richie kissed him back hard and pulled him through the front door, closing it behind him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is Richie's tweet btw. I'm on mobile and having trouble putting the image in the chapter. Sorry! 
> 
> https://twitter.com/nonbinaryuris/status/1238184670  
> 648508419?s=19


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this is the first fic I've finished in years. It's not the best but it's the best I could do. Writers block and depression is a hell of a creativity suppressant. But I hope you enjoy anyways. Leave a comment if you did and stay tuned for more Reddie/Stanlon content

Stan was sitting on the cool metal of the hood of his car, looking up at the stars in the sky. A blanket was draped over him suddenly and he turned to look at Mike with a smile. He climbed up onto the hood with him and pulled the blanket over him. 

"New Mexico is beautiful." Stan nodded in agreement.

"We're coming up on California soon. Are you excited?" Mike grinned and took a sip of his beer. 

"I can't wait to see it! And the ocean!" Stan scoffed.

"You've seen the ocean, love." Mike shook his head.

"Not the Pacific." 

After camping out for the night, they began the 13 hour drive to Los Angeles. The two men crossed into the city limits shortly after 9 that night, exhausted but excited to see Richie and Bill again. They drove through the massive city, making their way through Hollywood to Richie's home.

Pulling up in front of it was a shock. They both knew their friend was wealthy but his home showed just how wealthy. A huge, two story modern style home sat in front of them. It wasn't quite a mansion but close to it. 

"You think he has enough windows?" Stan asked, unbuckling his seatbelt.

"At least they're opaque. Who knows what he gets up to in there." They both laughed and stepped out of the car. 

Stan pressed the buzzer on the front gate and leaned against the stone wall. There was a loud thump from inside the house and they looked at each other confused. The buzzer crackled and Richie's muffled voice came through.

"Who is it?"

"Two guesses." Stan answered and Richie cackled.

"Holy shit! I'll buzz you in." The door buzzed and it swung open. 

They stepped through and closed the door behind them. The front door opened and Richie stepped out, socks and sweatpants on but no shirt. He ran forward and pulled them both into a tight hug. 

"What are you two lovebirds doing here?" He asked, pushing his glasses up. 

"Going on a national tour. Thought we'd show you some pity and drop by." Stan replied. Richie poked his stomach hard and frowned.

"Show me pity? If anyone needs pity, it's you. Have you seen how short you are?" Stan lunged forward and grabbed his midsection, attempting to wrestle him. Richie quickly got the upper hand and pulled him into a headlock. As Stan struggled to get free, Richie casually smiled at Mike.

"Hey buddy. You look good!" Mike smiled.

"Thanks, Rich. Now do you mind letting my man go?" He pouted but obliged and let his friend go. Stan punched him in the stomach and he groaned. 

"Low blow, Stan The Man." He put his hands on his hips and smiled. "Come on in! I'll show you how rich I am." 

They followed him inside and their jaws dropped. The house was all white walls with beautiful gray marble floors. His amazing kitchen was connected to his huge living room, the only divide a massive island. An enormous television was mounted onto the wall with a stand beneath with multiple consoles and machines on it. 

"Holy shit!" Mike whispered. Richie nodded with a self appreciative smile on his face. There was a noise from the other room and the smile quickly disappeared. "What was that?"

"Do you have a cat or something?" He grimaced and ruffled his hair.

"Or something." He held up a finger and ran down the hall. He disappeared around the corner and Mike turned to Stan.

"Cat or a hookup?" Stan pretended to contemplate his options before shrugging. 

"I'll go with cat." Mike nodded 

"I say hookup." Stan raised an eyebrow.

"Is that a bet? If so, you're on." They smiled and shook hands. Richie came back down the hallway with a sheepish smile on his face.

"Ok so I have a little bit of explaining to do." Before he could explain though, Eddie came down the hallway. He was wearing a Second City t-shirt and boxer briefs and his hair was sticking up. His face was flushed and he smiled nervously.

"Hey guys." 

"What the fuck?" The two of them said in unison. 

"He sorta lives here with me." 

The four of them moved to his massive sectional couch and sat down. The two couples sat across from one another and said nothing. An awkward silence filled the room before Eddie cleared his throat.

"So I'm gay...and I left my wife about two weeks ago. Now I'm here!" He said with a weak smile.

"Four out of seven? What do you think the odds are that the other three are too?" Richie said in a joking tone.

"Well I gave Bill a blowjob once in high school so I'd say the odds are pretty high." Stan said, seriously.

"Really?" Mike asked. Stan smiled and patted his thigh. 

"No." 

The silence returned for again for a moment but Eddie spoke up.

"This isn't weird guys. We're all in loving, supportive relationships. It's just a surprise." Richie smiled at him and grabbed his hand.

"Well nobody said it was a surprise." Stan said with a smirk.

"But you guys were shocked to see him though?" 

"Well yeah but I've known how you two felt about each other for years. It was pretty obvious." Richie scoffed. 

"No it wasn't." Stan raised an eyebrow and tilted his head, his lips pursed.

"I'm not blind, Rich. You two bickered like an old married couple all the time but you always had your hands on each other. Bumping shoulders, squeezing into that shitty hammock together, sitting in each other's laps when we were all squeezed on Bill's couch during our movie nights. You two have been in love with each other since we were in elementary school." 

Richie squeezed Eddie's hand and pulled it up to his lips. He smiled and bumped their shoulders together.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mike awoke the next morning and stretched his arms over his head. His legs shuddered from his stretch and he yawned. Stan was asleep on his stomach and his curls were tousled on his head. He placed his hand on them and gently ran his fingers through his silky locks. Stan inhaled sharply and rolled onto his side, facing Mike.

"Good morning." He mumbled. Mike leaned down and kissed his forehead.

"Good morning, gorgeous." Stan smiled and grabbed his hand. He leaned up and Mike eagerly moved towards him. Their lips met and Stan pulled Mike down, pressing their chests together. 

"As much as I'd love to have killer morning sex right now, I'd prefer not to do it in Richie's guest bedroom." Mike said when they pulled apart.

"Fuck Richie. These walls are stone and if he still hears us, then we're having really good sex." 

Mike groaned but gave in and leaned back in to kiss him. Stan pulled him close and wrapped his hand around the back of his thigh, pressing his lips to his throat. 

"Fuck…" Mike moaned, softly. "I love you."

"I love you too." He whispered back, pulling him in for another kiss.

After their morning tryst, the two of them dressed and headed out into the living room. Richie was on the couch in his pajamas and watching something on the television.

" _ In other news, comedian Richie Tozier has been otherwise quiet on social media after his public coming out. The actor casually dropped the news that he was bisexual on his Twitter shortly after rumors about him and his close friend, fashion designer Beverly Marsh, started spreading across the internet. _ " Richie muted the TV and pumped his fist in celebration. 

"Hell yeah! I'm still hot news on gossip TV." 

"Hasn't it been like a week?" He nodded and pulled his phone out. 

"I've got thousands of Twitter notifications and hundreds of messages. I'm more famous now." Stan rolled his eyes and sat down at the counter and Mike began fixing them both a cup of coffee.

"I'm surprised you haven't started floating." Richie looked over his shoulder at him. 

"What?"

"From how inflated your ego is." He flipped him off and went back to staring at his phone. 

"Where's Eddie?" Mike asked, putting the mugs down on the counter in front of Stan.

"Probably shopping. He doesn't trust the delivery service. Paranoid little bastard." Eddie rounded the corner suddenly with several cloth tote bags on his arms and a glare he immediately directed at Richie. 

"I heard that." Richie grinned and turned back to the TV.

"What's all this?" Mike asked, walking over to gesture at the bags.

"Thanksgiving! Well the food for it. I got a big turkey and a bunch of other stuff. I figured we could have a big dinner." 

"I think it sounds great! We should invite the others too. We'll have a proper get together for the first time in forever." Stan had a huge smile on his face at the idea.

"Yeah. The Chinese place was awful and Stan wasn't there. Let's do it!" Mike and Stan did a quick complicated handshake that Richie frowned at.

"You guys have a secret handshake?! Eddie can we-"

"No!"

\---------------------------------------------------------------

"HAPPY THANKSGIVING, LOSERS!" Richie stood on his chair over his friends and popped the cork on the sparkling wine. It sprayed over them which earned squeals from them all. He leaned down and began filling their empty glasses with a grin, foam dripping down his face.

"You better clean some of this up before we bring the food out!" Eddie scolded him. Richie flipped him off which his boyfriend quickly reciprocated. 

"Well aren't you two a picture of loving, domestic bliss!" Bill said jokingly. Richie jumped off the table and sat next to him.

"You're just jealous because you're single now." Bill pointed at him with a playful glare. 

"I will end you, Tozier."

"I'd like to see you t-t-t-try!" Bill quickly smacked him in the mouth and Mike snorted.

"Asshole." 

Eddie and Ben came out of the kitchen carrying the turkey and various dishes. Stan was close behind with a gravy boat and a pan full of bread rolls. They set the food on the table and took their seats, save for Eddie who stood over the large roasted bird.

"Should we pray?"

"What is this? Church? Carve the bird, Spaghetti." He smacked Eddie's butt and leaned back in his chair.

They served themselves, filling up their plates with delicious smelling food. They drank and ate, talking loudly over one another while holding multiple conversations around the table. They fell silent though when Mike tapped his knife against his glass. He stood up and cleared his throat.

"Is this a speech? Are you doing a speech, Mikey?" Richie questioned. Eddie put his hand over his mouth and motioned for Mike to continue.

"Well Losers. We've had a hell of a year."

"Hell of a life." Ben mumbled, earning a chorus of agreements.

"That's true! But we've risen above it all. We've been through hell and I'm happy to see us all here. Alive and well. To the Losers!"

"To the Losers!" They all raised their glasses and cheered.

"I thought you were gonna tell us some dramatic news or something." Bev said with a laugh.

"Like what? The fact that we're moving in together when we go back to Atlanta?? Stan said with a smile. Bev squealed and leaned over to hug him. 

"I'm so happy for you two! Are you staying in your house or getting a new place?" Stan put his hand on top of Mike's and shrugged.

"We're still working out the details."

"Well we've got some news too." Richie stood as he made his announcement. "We got drunk in Vegas a few weeks ago and got married." The rest of the table fell silent, clearly shocked.

"Guys, he's joking." Eddie said, pulling him back into his seat. "My divorce isn't even finalized yet. Plus I don't think I can marry him this soon. I'd lose my mind."

"You will eventually though." 

"In your dreams." 

They spent the rest of the evening talking and catching up, not ending their dinner party until the early hours of the morning. They cleaned up and everyone retired to one of the many bedrooms in Richie's mansion.

They ate leftovers the next morning and Bill, Bev, and Ben headed out afterwards. Mike and Stan packed up their car and left a few hours after them. Richie gave Stan a big tight hug as he prepared to leave. 

"Look at us, Stanny. We're adults now. In relationships. Did you ever think we'd get this lucky? " His voice broke a bit and Stan kissed his forehead, standing on his toes to do it. 

"They're lucky too. All of us are." They hugged again before the pair climbed into their car and drove off. 

Eddie stood next to Richie and bumped his shoulder against him. He looked down at his boyfriend and smiled. 

"Wanna hook up in the living room?" He asked with a grin.

"How about we clean up and watch a western instead? We can have hot couch sex later." Eddie laughed and nodded, lacing their fingers together. 

\---------------------------------------------------------------

**_FIVE YEARS LATER_ **

"How do I look?" Richie asked, turning to Stan with a nervous smile.

"Why do you care? You're not getting married."

"I have to look better than you though. It's what brothers do." 

"We're not brothers and if you upstage me today, I'll kill you." Richie grinned nervously.

"I won't. Cross my heart."

"And  _ hope _ you die." Stan said, adjusting his tie.

"Hey!"

Eddie entered the room with Scout on his hip. She made grabby hands for Richie who scooped her up with a smile. She giggled and he kissed her cherubic face.

"How's my favorite girl?" She giggled and patted his cheeks.

"Unca!" He laughed.

"It's uncle, not unca. You're lucky you're cute because you're dumb as shit." He said, still using a baby voice. Eddie looked at him horrified and grabbed the baby from his arms.

"I'm so glad we're not parents because you're awful at talking to kids." She kissed Eddie's face and he smiled at her. "You want mommy? Let's go find mommy!" He exited the room with Scout babbling the whole time.

"I think I might puke." Richie turned to face him and jabbed a finger in his face. 

"Mike won't kiss you if you puke. Drink some of this." He handed him a glass of soda on the vanity and Stan took a sip. The second it hit his tastebuds, he sputtered in shock. 

"What is this?"

"It's a seven and seven. Drink some more liquid courage and let's get your ass down the aisle."

20 minutes later, Richie and Stan were standing at the end of the aisle, arm in arm. Soft piano music was playing as he walked him up to the lectern where Bill was standing. He had a small notebook in his hand and he was smiling. 

Richie left him there before taking a step behind him. Mike came up next, escorted by Eddie. They copied Stan and Richie and the room fell silent. Mike and Stan couldn't keep their eyes off each other and Bill smiled. 

"Are you two ready?" He whispered. They nodded in unison and he opened his notebook. "Alright, let's do this."

The ceremony wasn't long and there wasn't a dry eye in the house afterwards. After a quick but amorous kiss, Stan crushed the glass under his heel and the room erupted into applause. The two of them rushed down the aisle as their friends and family threw rice and flower petals.

"I'm surprised we got hitched before them." Richie said to Eddie later that night. Mike and Stan were sharing their first dance as  _ Your Song  _ played.

"Well they're more romantic and reserved. We're both a bit…insane." Richie laughed and grabbed his husband's hand. Their gold bands glistened under the twinkling fairy lights overhead. 

"That's true. My sister says you're like a feral chihuahua." Eddie laughed.

Scout toddled around her parents table before stumbling towards the dance floor. Ben rushed forward and snatched his daughter up before she could get near the newlyweds. Stan laughed and he whispered something to Mike who chuckled.

"We should have a kid." Eddie said suddenly, earning a shocked look from Richie.

"You just told me like two hours ago that I'd be a bad dad."

"More like a bad role model." His voice was soft and he leaned in to kiss him. "But you'd be a good dad."

"Well shit! I guess we're having a kid. Should we just snatch Scout up now or wait a bit?" 

"Shut up."

They continued to watch the couple dance before the song finally ended and they waved their guests onto the dance floor as a faster paced song began. Richie stood and offered his hand to Eddie.

"May I have this dance?" He raised an eyebrow.

"You wanna dance to... _ Karma Chameleon _ ?" He nodded and pulled him out of his seat. He yanked him over to the dance floor where everyone was dancing around Scout who was screaming with laughter. 

" _ Karma karma karma karma chameleon! You come and go! You come and go! _ " Everyone was singing in unison and they joined in their upbeat dance and sang along.

"Mazel Tov!" Richie shouted as the song drew to a close. Everyone cheered and Mike pulled his friends in for an embrace. 

"To the Losers Club!" Stan shouted. The seven of them laughed and swayed together as the next song began.

  
  
  


  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE END

**Author's Note:**

> Whoo! A lot more story to go! This is only about a quarter of the story, maybe a fifth. Lots more development to be written and I started this shit 3 months ago.


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